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Problem Solver
Let's stop eating --
My cock sure could use a good beating
These useless goats are stuck in my head
Son of Man told me to neighborly break bread

So I'm howling at the moon and I'm not making any alterations
Saluting complex decisions made by enemy nations
U.S. of A. is launching radar-evading jet fighters
While Commies have jailed rebellious writers

Lower the disguise, do not hide
Not my fault, Dear President lied
Inside battle not yet won
Truth is, my grandfather thirsts for a gun

All is quiet with death at the door
My Muslim brothers declare a backyard war
While my ex-girlfriend is finally seeing someone new
Several months have passed, I remember you

Salty cow's tongue (against my chest) tasted like honey
Sold under black market tables, whoring for lots of money
Packing up my luggage, heading for Argentina
For years I secretly wished to date last year's ballerina

Once told a man that I'd be on a box of cereal
Addicted to St. Matthew's Vaseline material
Milk missing and children missing
Shorelines of Jersey reminiscing

Scattered synapses transmitted
Neurological institute committed
One day masturbated in her sight
To Freud's mother, a trans-Atlantic delight

Politics at Brooklyn's wooden table
Architecture to God burned to a child's fable
Remind you: my next-door resident is a nigger
Truth is, I'd pull my grandfather's trigger

Bring on the jungle and mount the Veteran's flag
It's my wide girth that gets every little old fart fag
Offend you with my art, offend you with my words
Fourth day sunrise, we'll kiss the Kurds

Debt rises with the ticking of the clock
Mounting doubts among the shepherd's flock
Worldwide spread of McDonald's juicy lard
Let me promote myself and give you my card

Coffee consumed and I have to take a smelly piss
Exhausted of watching the common Republican hiss
Return of the fighter jet and grandfather's revolver
How have I become the number one problem solver?

 2009 David Greg Harth